“By learning you will teach; by teaching you will understand.” -A Latin Proverb

As most people who know me well know, I have wanted to be a teacher for a long time. When I was a kid, I would think every year “This is the grade I want to teach!” I have always been nerd-like in my love for school, even forcing my best childhood friend to sit and listen to me ‘lecture’ in my garage and I would give her homework afterwards. When I got to Bethel University for my undergraduate program, I enrolled as a Post-Secondary 5-12: Social Studies major. Yet, before even starting the program, something just didn’t feel right. How was I supposed to mix my passions for leadership, counseling and teaching all into one occupation? Sure I was fascinated by World War II and understanding the details of our history, but it didn’t embrace all that I wanted to learn. So, I switched to a major in Psychology and tagged on a Communication major during second semester of my freshman year.

There were many key moments in classes where I found myself thinking, ‘yep, this is it!’ I want to teach leadership classes! Or counseling classes! But, it was during my study abroad trip to Europe that my love from communication studies began to illuminate. It was so practical..and so powerful. How we engage others and represent ourselves can shape every area of our lives. It affects our personal relationships, job performance, family dynamics, and how we view ourselves. I became deeply fascinated with these intricacies and began to see teaching these dynamics as a great future possibility.

The journey to starting my graduate program so I can be qualified to teach Communication studies at a college level as been an unpredictable one. After moving to Colorado Springs right after college graduation (hey, even I needed a break from class!), I became a waitress at PF Changs. Through that I gained connections to my first full-time job for a non-profit and serving as a freelance writer for Compassion International. Both jobs served as major assets in developing my own communication skills through writing and working in a professional environment.

Now, after getting married, having my first child, and continuing to grow professionally, it is time to pursue my Masters to finally reach the goal of being a teacher.

In my first semester of grad school, I am in a class called Communication for the Classroom Teacher. I took this class on purpose in my first term, just to confirm that I am on the right path. The first night of class, I felt so giddy it’s almost embarrassing to admit. It suddenly hit me that, I was learning about teaching! What I had been waiting for seemingly forever!

What I didn’t expect that first night would be the intense mental journey the class has taken me on to date. It has been a heavy realization of the complexity and responsibility that a teacher must contain. Is it truly possible to reach every student? If not, how do I resolve that? How do I best serve the students who show a deep motivation to learn? What about those who appear apathetic but just need someone to reach out? Will I be smart enough about my discipline to be seen as credible? Will I change students’ lives…for better or worse? Is it possible to care too much?

These are the questions that I have been confronted with and will spend some time hashing out for the next few months of this project, and I’m sure years to come.